Remembering Johnny's big step

I have thought many times how wonderful it would be if I became one of those amazing photographers who could take beautiful pictures of my children.  I sometimes wonder why I haven't taken the time to learn how to Photoshop photos or why I haven't spent the money on a really nice camera, and then I remember...I have about 10 other hobbies that I want to pursue before that one.  The pictures that I take in my mind are gorgeous, I wish that I could somehow blog with those.

Anyway, I decided that I wanted to remember how great Johnny looked in his new suit when he turned 8 years old.  I decided that our family would take a Sunday trip to the Bountiful temple so that I could snap some pictures of him.  He wasn't too happy that everyone else got to change out of their Sunday clothes and that he had to wear his least favorite Sunday outfit ever. Thinking back, I should have had everyone keep their church clothes on, but I wasn't feeling up to the struggle that day.  He still had a great time running around and exploring the grounds once we got there.  After all, an eight-year-old boy is still and eight-year-old boy, even in a suit.

He sure did look handsome, but once again my pictures can't show the pride that I feel for this boy, or the happiness that we felt while walking around the temple grounds as a family.  It was a great day.

We love you Johnny, and are proud of you for the step that you took to become a member of the church.  It was a big step, and the beginning of many big and important steps that you will take in your life.

-

 

Ballerina in training

It is so fun to see the differences in our children, they really do come with their own personalities.  I mention this because, for the past two years Maddie has told me that she wants to "dance with a lot of girls in dresses." I never thought of putting Hannah in dance, she was about as excited about dancing as most of us would be to get a flu shot.  Luckily she has about a million other interests, so I didn't feel like she was lacking in any way. 

 I bit the bullet this year and decided it was time to sign Maddie up for a class where she could dance with a lot of girls dresses=tutus.  Actually, they just wear leotards and footless tights right now, which she is a little disappointed about.  It is only during the recitals where they wear anything different

 She just can't stop skipping and leaping, I think that she loves it, and she seems to be learning a lot.

 ...and just for fun, I thought that I would throw in another random picture of Maddie's randomness.

Teaching an old trick to new puppies

One of the great things about having kids is that we have new subjects to play practical jokes on, and it is all new to them.  I love that they think it is so funny, because it is one of our favorite things to do.  I realize that we have quite the theatrical group here, welcome to our family.

sew we sew

So for the past year Hannah and her friends have spent hours in my craft room cutting and hot gluing scrap fabric together to make outfits for their stuffed animals.  It is fun to see what they come up with, and pretty amazing to see what can be done with hot glue.  She and I have played with the sewing machine  off and on for the past few years, but it wasn't until a few months ago that I finally decided that it was time to teach her how to make something for herself that she could actually use.  She loves going to fabric stores and she seems to have much more appreciation for designs in fabrics than I ever did.  She was excited to pick out three different types on fabrics for some p.j. pants and get to work.

I didn't realize that it would be so hard to carve out time to sit with Hannah and teach her how to sew, life is pretty busy right now, but she made sure that it happened.  I had a great time chatting with her after all of the other kids had gone to bed, and she seems so happy when it is just the two of us.  She did an awesome job with the p.j. pants.  All three of them are very cute on her...although what wouldn't be cute on this girl?  I know that our floor is kind of gross here, I hate having carpet in the dinning room.  That's something that I hope to remedy sometime this year.

 

 See that thing which Hannah is using in the picture below, yes that is a SERGER!  The Woot website is now my best friend.  There have been times when it has been an enemy to me, like when they were selling the howling monkeys (which John bought for our kids), and the camoflauge telephone that works better than any of our other home phones, but which we can never find.  They had a great deal a few weeks ago and John surprised me with this awesome gift, a serger which came with a brand new sewing machine.  They are both very cool, and I can't wait to try some more fun stuff on them.

The List

I am smart enough now to know that each of my children is different and masters concepts on his or her own timetable, but I like the idea of breaking it up into years so that I know when to start teaching a skill.  Plus, this way I won't forget to teach them something that might turn out to be really important later.

So, at these ages they will learn:

Three years old

Get dressed by yourself

Start brushing teeth by yourself

pick up your own toys

say your own prayers

begin earning dad dollars

plant, weed and water personal garden

Start doing dinner chores (set table, take plate to sink)

letters and numbers 1-10
Start swimming lessons each summer until completion

Four years old

How to brush teeth independently

Make your own bed

Make your own breakfast

Make sandwiches

Begin cleaning your own room

Dinner Chores (wipe down table and chairs)
How to write name and know the sounds that letters make.

Learn about stranger danger and being safe

Clean self after using toilet independently

Numbers 1-100

Five years old

Set summer and school year goals

Clean room independently

Learn how to use the vacuum

Empty little garbage cans

learn about time, use timer and a plan to get ready for school on time.

Dinner chores (rinse off dishes, unload dishwasher)

start playing soccer

Memorize phone number and address

learn how to read simple books
learn how to play catch with different kinds of balls

Six years old

Take a shower independently

dust

learn how to clean sinks and counter tops

learn how to clean mirrors and windows

work microwave

Make and answer phone calls

learn how to wash dishes by hand

Practice playing catch with different kinds of balls once a week
Know how to make your own lunch

Seven years old

Arrange own play dates

Floss teeth independently

clean toilets

mop floors

learn how to hit a baseball

Brush tangles out of hair

vacuum car
Learn how to play checkers
Practice playing catch with different kinds of balls once a week

Eight years old

Dinner chores (load dishwasher)

learn how to dribble and shoot a basketball

learn how to use a hammer and nails in fairly thick wood

cut homemade bread

use an apple cutter

use a vegetable peeler

use a can opener, safely open pop-top cans

learn how to safely use a pocket knife

First facts of life talk with mom and dad

learn how harmful drugs and alcohol affect your body

wake up by yourself in the morning (alarm clock)

Start saving and paying tithing

get baptized

care for a pet

read scriptures

Wash car
Learn how to play chess

Nine years old

Start a recipe box

Try any new active sport that you think you may be interested in.
(stop playing soccer if you want)

learn how to read notes and find keys on a piano

clean pictures

Bake cakes or cupcakes from a box

Bake 2 types of cookies

Bake 2 types of quick breads

Make cream cheese frosting

wash car windows at gas station

fill car with gas

cook rice

cook pasta

cook vegetables

Write and send letters

have an e-mail account

Sew on buttons

simple mending with needle and thread
learn how to hit a ball with a racket (tennis/bad-mitten or ping pong)

Ten years old

chop vegetables

make salad

Puberty/hygiene talk

start learning a musical instrument

Maintain a personal journal

Clean stove top

Clean oven

clean cupboards

Straighten drawers

Straighten closets

Use a leaf blower

know how to use a cell phone

Know articles of faith

Keep a personal calendar

learn how to sew pajama pants

Mix dry milk
Learn how to do your own hair
Decide on one sport or physical activity to undertake through the year

Eleven Years old
Decide on one sport or physical activity to undertake through the year

Arrange for own haircuts

clean refrigerator

Sew hems

Bake pies

Bake bread

Make several main dishes

Iron own clothes

Use a camera

Learn to crochet or knit

Participate in first aid training

Take a baby-sitting class
Learn how to do laundry

Twelve years old

Decide on one sport or physical activity to undertake through the year
know how to take care of self during common illnesses (medicine safety)

give lesson in family home evening about good nutrition

Understand how media uses photo manipulation and advertisements.

Understand what it means to have a healthy body image and respect for others.

Type without looking

Learn and practice internet social network safety

Shop for clothing with a budget

Have basic fashion awareness

Plan wardrobe

Learn how to find good books to read by reading reviews and reserving books at library.

Read the news with mom and dad and understand how to deal with info in a positive way.

Speak in public

Make and keep dentist appointment

Make and keep doctor appointment

Understand basic filing on computer and with important papers

Use common computer programs

Learn how to safely use power tools

Order something by internet

Read entire book of Mormon

Attend Priesthood or Young Women activities

Basic car maintenance

Paint and decorate room with a set budget

Baby-sit

Start saving and preparing for mission/college

Thirteen years old

Mow lawn

Edge lawn

Plan a party

know how to handle and cook meat

Plan meals

Have own recipe files

Shop for groceries with a budget

Certify for CPR

Make a piece of furniture with wood and power tools (with help)

learn about shaving and makeup

Learn etiquette rules

clean garage

Pick out material and a pattern of your choice and sew a piece of clothing

Learn methods for de-junking and saving important things

Learn how to bottle or freeze garden harvest

Make freezer jam

Hang shelf on a wall using studs and drill
Organize a family service project
Decide on one sport or physical activity to undertake through the year

Fourteen and fifteen

Decide on one sport or physical activity to undertake through each year
Use ATM

Learn how to write a check

Get food handlers permit

Understand food storage basics

Memorize social security number

Make a budget

Understand and use debit card

Learn interest and debt

sell items on internet

Learn basic civics and politics

Accompany parent to vote

Perform thorough car detailing

Change flat tire

Jump start a car

Understand basics of car operation and how to use a car manual.

Make a quilt

Learn how to find a job, apply for it and practice interviewing

write a resume

Get a summer job

Open a checking account

Go on mock date with mom or dad each year and learn about dating etiquette

Take a social dance class

Sixteen and Seventeen

Get driver's license

Understand credit cards

Learn retirement plan

Resume mission preparation (Johnny)

Understand how to advertise

Start career planning

Start checking out colleges and apply for them

Perform household repairs

Assist in purchase of car (or mock purchase of car)

File tax return

Deal with auto mechanic

Learn how to unclog a drain

Install a light fixture

learn how to maintain a sprinkler system

learn about utility payments
Decide on one sport or physical activity to undertake through each year

Have and take care of basic cellphone (learn set-up, customer service, payments, etc.)

How I want my children to turn out

Today my sister Kathleen called me.  I love it when she calls me because we usually have very in depth conversations about life and parenting.  We have become great friends now, but when we were younger she would often tell me in her blunt older sibling manner to grow a backbone.  Of course I dutifully obeyed (haha), and much to the credit of experiencing life with children and a lot of inspiration and prayer I have grown one.

As we were talking, I mentioned to her that I was not one of those women who slipped into motherhood easily.  There was a lot of crying and second guessing myself and I had no idea what it felt like to follow my motherly instincts--what are those? As a result I read quite a few parenting books and I soon found that I was more confused than ever. Shortly after Hannah was born...or was it Johnny? ...I decided to put away the books (yeah it took a while to trust myself), and I didn't pick up another one until this year.  It came highly recommended, and just when I needed it.  I haven't read all of the way through it, and I am not sure that I will.  I got what I needed from the second chapter and I am ready to get to work. It is called the Parenting Breakthrough by Marilee Boyak.  She talks about making a plan for teaching your children how to become the kind of people that you wish for them to be.  Actually, it is called The Parenting Breakthrough:  Real-life plan teach kids to work, save money and be truly independent.  In other words, the kind of people that I wish for them to be.  It can be applied to just about anything though.  I am very much a step by step person, so this struck a chord with me.  It is even hard for me to get to the end of my day unless I have written out a plan.  I liked her plan, and the concept so I decided to get to work.

First, as she suggested, I wrote down my wishes for the people that I want my children to become.

These are mine.  Written down like this, they seem somehow less from the heart, but every time I re-read this list I get the same lump in my throat.  I want my kids to turn out to be good people so much that it hurts. I know that when it comes down to it, they themselves will be the deciding factor, but at least I will know that I have done everything in my power to teach them what they need to know to live good and happy lives.

I want them to:
*Take good care of their own bodies (nutrition/ exercise/ hygiene)
*Feel confident that they have talents and skills, and know how to apply those to life and work.
*Know how to get a job
*Work hard and do well in a job/mission (good work ethics)
*Know how to make, save, budget and invest money to be dept free.
*Be honest, kind, compassionate, prayerful, grateful
*Know how to plan and make good meals.
*Know and practice basic sports techniques and rules (Jr. High survival)
*Know how to take care of a house (cleaning, decorating and basic repairs).
*Know how to de-junk
*Know how to plant, harvest and store food from a garden.
*Practice good time management
*Frequently make and achieve goals.
*Graduate from college in a degree that can support them and bring them joy.
*Know how to get a date
*Know how to treat a date with love and respect.
*Know how to love others and search for service opportunities.
*Know how to take care of a pet and treat it well.
*Know how to take care of the basic needs of babies and toddlers.

Then I came up with my plan, I used quite a few of her ideas, but I adapted quite a few more to fit our family and my personal wishes for our children.  My kids actually enjoyed looking through the list with me. They had fun checking off what they had already learned and looking forward to the things that they will get to learn every year from now until they are ready to graduate from High school.  Of course there are somethings that they are not looking forward to learning, but that is where my nice strong backbone will come in handy.  I am sure that a few things will change as I gain more experience and as my kids grow.  But for now, this is a great stepping block in helping me become the kind of mom that I want to be.  Tomorrow I will post the list that I made for them.  It's kind of fun to look through and it gives me ideas of things that we can do together on our "dates".  They feel so smart and grown up when they can check something off as already learned.

Constant slumber party

Having two little girls share the same room can bring a lot of excitement into our home.  There are many nights where we go to bed to the sound of laughter and talking.  I love it!  Only sometimes it is screaming and hitting, I don't love that.  The other night Maddie and Lucy decided to have a sleepover in between their beds.  I must have nodded off before they settled down because this is not how it looked when I tucked them into bed.  (Someday soon I will finish Lucy's bed, I promise!)

This is what my bed looked like when I woke up the next morning.  Maddie came in and crawled into bed with me sometime during the night.  She must have been cold. John leaves for work around 5:30 a.m. and Lucy came in and took his place soon after he left.